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  • Violeta M. Bagia

If something doesn’t feel right, say something, act.

Don’t let the fear of seeming annoying or sensitive put you off standing up for yourself.

Too often I’ve seen far too many girls deal with unwanted advances, unwanted dick pics and unwanted sexualised comments or compliments. If you know where you stand on the above and enjoy it, by all means continue, but if you don’t and you feel uncomfortable and in a precarious position, say something and act.

And if saying something is too hard, believe me, I hate confrontation too, block them,

report them, do whatever you need to feel safe.

In a time where social media is an ever-present part of our lives, we shouldn’t be forced into the dead zone where we make pilgrimage with our forefathers and use the sun dial to tell the time, but we should know what steps to take to protect ourselves.

You don’t need to justify it or explain it to anyone.

So, simply block the individual, ensure you keep your mind protected and know that you’ve taken the right steps for you.

Sometimes it can seem dramatic and you ask yourself whether you’re overreacting, let me tell you straight up, you’re not. If you even have to ask that question, you’re doing the right thing.

Now, what’s next?

Well, I can’t tell you that, but let us part on some general advice (insert disclaimer here about not being a psychologically trained professional) but what I do have, is experience. I’ve been there, I’ve gone through it, I’ve lived it.

I can’t say it gets easier, but I can say that you get stronger, you learn how to fight these battles even though it kills me that we still have to in 2019. 

But, as long as we do, know that you aren’t alone, you aren’t fighting it solo and you’ll always have warriors beside you.

Recently, I’ve heard stories from my closest friends that absolutely broke my heart, things like, “well it wasn’t as bad as a rape,” or, “it wasn’t like what you went through”, and I just want to hug and shake them all at once. 

Ladies, friends, women; it isn’t about who had it worst! It’s about us and us fighting what did happen and does happen every day to people we know, love and care about.

And in saying that, know that you can talk about this, you can share, you can write or

draw, you can express and educate. Don’t feel the burden of silence.

In conclusion, I’ll reiterate the fact, if something doesn’t feel right, say something, act.


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